This weekend I took time to clean out a number of spaces in my apartment (Aidan’s toys, my clothes, his clothes) and listened to some A Beautiful Mess podcast episodes while I did so. It was really inspiring, especially their episode where they went back to their bucket lists from 2020 to update on how things looked now. Also, for me, having time to actually tackle some clutter after a very busy summer felt so good!! And confirmed that that is one of my big goals for this Fall season - to go through my whole home, in my little pockets of kid-free time, and really cull and clean, make my home a place I’m delighted to be instead of stressed out by.
I also have been considering what the purpose of this website is. It costs a fair bit of money to keep it up. Why am I paying $200 a year to host a website that I don’t post to, that doesn’t make me any money or have other benefits for me? But I do eventually want to be writing on a more regular basis (see below for my bucket list) … So I may take it down for a little while, just to save some money, I may not - we’ll see.
But, inspired by the ABM gals and my weekend of cleaning, I also wanted to check in with myself, on my own goals and where I’m at in life. The last few years have gone by at a truly breakneck pace, have been very beautiful, have been very interesting and full of surprises and twists and turns. The me in 2015 who had her own design freelance business and was also working full time in a local non-profit, didn’t have a kid and was still in the closet - I’m so curious what she would think about where I am at now.
So, to update:
I spent the last few years work-wise working in the Career Development space, helping people find employment. Two of those three years were working specifically with teenagers, in three local High Schools, and I really loved that work so, so much.
And then in the last few months, I’ve taken on a new role, that of Executive Director for the Cape Breton Food Hub. I’m really proud of this, and of the work that the organization is doing. It was a lot of work to go through the application and interview process (and maybe one day I’ll post more about that! If you have questions about career stuff like resumes, cover letters and interviews, just shoot me a message) and it’s a lot more work now to be in the role. It taps into so many skill sets of mine and it is fun and exciting!
I’m also the Board Chair of ACAP Cape Breton, in my third year of being on that board. It is also great work, and can be time-consuming. It feels really good though to be contributing to an organization that is doing really important work for the environment, and I’ve learned a TON about leadership and working on a team. My time with that Board will wrap up in one year, in September 2025, and I’m looking forward to having some time back, but also I will miss it, I know.
My son is now 6 and a half years old, and counting the days to turning seven in January. I still share custody 50/50 with his dad, and it’s working well. Aidan is in soccer, and hockey, and swimming. He tried lacrosse last spring. He’s a terrific reader, loves math, plays video games. The baby days and toddler days are long past, they feel like a lifetime ago! We’re full-speed ahead with busy-boy days. I spend time in rinks each weekend or on soccer fields, and I honestly love that. I love my “boy mom” era.
I’m also in a long-distance relationship with a wonderful woman who is from Cape Breton, and lives most of the year in Iceland. We matched on a dating app in Summer 2022, but started dating last year, Summer 2023. Last spring I travelled to Iceland to visit her and the country, and it was incredible. My first travel experience in 6 years reignited that itch and I’m hoping to go back this winter, with Aidan this time. She’ll move here to Cape Breton eventually, but for now, this works for us and is good.
So without further ado, here’s what is exciting to me right now and feels realistic to actually achieve, in the next few years:
Career-wise: grow the organization I’m now the Director of, expand the reach of the Food Hub and the local food movement in Cape Breton. Help increase real food security in my home community. Help support my staff in achieving their own goals. What a dream come true!
Home-wise: spend my kid-free weekends cleaning and culling all of my things. (This is more of a Fall 2024/Winter 2025 thing.) And then in the next couple of years, look to buying a home. This hasn’t been possible financially for me, but I’m hopeful that now it can be! I’d like a little house somewhere in North Sydney, with a little yard. Nothing too big or crazy.
Writing: Still working on that novel, hahaha. It’s OK that it is on the back burner right now, and I want to finish out my term as the ACAP Board Chair strong, but once that’s done next September I’d like to use some free time for my writing. I’m treating myself to going to the Cabot Trail Writers Festival this year though, to keep that ember glowing.
Braces: I’m in my second year of potentially three years of dental rearranging. I’ll need a few surgeries too along the way. It’s going well so far! It’s not just for aesthetic purposes, there are some big issues with my teeth and gums that this is hopefully going to help me keep my own teeth in my own head for more years to come. It takes some extra time to clean and floss, and go for my regular appointments, but I think it will be worth it in the end and am looking forward to them being done.
Physical fitness and working out: this has gone through seasons with me. I do love lifting heavy weights and have loved JONO Athletics. I’d like to get back into a routine there, but for the immediate moment, it’s not possible financially and also to find time in the day. But my job has some physical elements (helping to pack orders on Wednesdays requires a lot of lifting) so that is nice, keeps me active. I’ll also share that on the health front it’s been a big year - I had a LEEP done late last year, and then in February had a health scare when my appendix ruptured and I ended up in hospital for two weeks with complications. I also had my first mammogram (since I turned 40 in April, these will be a regular thing now!) although there were no issues there, thankfully. And, I was diagnosed with sleep apnea and in May started using a CPAP machine to help with that. Overall it’s been a year where I’ve been thinking a lot about my health and trying to treat myself as well as I can, get rest and stay hydrated and not too stressed.
Parenting: things like selling hockey tickets, getting Halloween costumes, making Aidan’s lunches for school, making sure we both eat healthy meals, being ready for Christmas AND Aidan’s birthday (they happen within two weeks of each other), helping him with schoolwork, et cetera, et cetera… this normal everyday stuff all brings me a lot of joy these days. AND, takes a lot of effort. I want to do the best I can at all of this and not feel harried or hectic, as much as possible. (And yes, I do know that some of that is out of my control.) So for me that means planning ahead as much as I can, and also coming back to that point above about culling my things and keeping my home space clean. Because then I’m happier about the action items and not anxiously looking at piles of things.
One of the things that happens as a result of this busy phase of life I’m in is I don’t get as much time as I’d like to spend socially or with friends, even keeping in touch with people via text. I’ve wasted a lot of energy feeling bad about this, over the years! And still do from time to time. But, I’m trying to give myself permission to allow it to be what it is, and not take it on as a failing, but moreso just the way things are right now - both for me and lots of other people. I do cherish my Book Club for being a monthly get-together with some friends, and am also grateful for friends who “get it” and are forgiving for long lapses. It’s also been nice to make new friends, usually other parents who are also at the rink or soccer field, or library for Story-time, etc.
Anyway, onwards and upwards! It felt good to write this all out here like this. Like old times, in a way, and like journalling, too. Let’s see how I get along with all of this! I hope you’re all well.
